28 April 2009

CSI Recap: Unfriendly Skies (Episode 109)

at 4:24 PM 0 comments


Previously on CSI, I recapped the pilot and “Cool Change” and then you guys voted for me to recap “Unfriendly Skies” next. This means we’re going to miss the Grissom/Sara face touching and “tie me up” scenes in “Crate ‘n Burial,” Nicky’s pretty tears in “Who Are You?,” and a wee Dakota Fanning in “Blood Drops.” I think y’all need to take a moment and really think about what you’ve done.

A CGI plane flies into McCarran airport in Las Vegas as the sun sets. The pilot radios from the cockpit that emergency personnel and cops will be needed on the ground. I wonder if that has anything to do with the scream and a little kid calling, “Mommy!”

After the plane has landed, Brass meets Grissom and they head into the plane. There’s a dead body on the floor of the first class cabin. All the first class passengers and the one flight attendant, who have been sequestered, claim the man died after a panic attack. Grissom peers around at the signs of vioence and clearly thinks there’s more to it. “I got a dead body, a crime scene with wings…something very wrong happened in this plane.” The rest of us call that “airplane food,” Grissom.

Before Grissom can even begin his investigation, he’s accosted by the sheriff. It turns out the FAA, which has jurisdiction, won’t be able to arrive on the scene for 12 hours. The sheriff strongly advises Grissom to solve the case and hand over whoever killed the guy before then, so the FAA won’t take all the glory. Grissom points out that he’s not sure yet if a murder was even committed, but the sheriff doesn’t believe Grissom would’ve had the entire plane taped off for an accidental death. Grissom ponders this and suddenly realizes the sheriff is running for mayor. He looks positively gleeful about sussing it out, like he’s about to run off and leak the tip to the local gossip blog.

Inside the plane, the entire team has assembled. The victim has been identified as Tony Candlewell, a businessman with no record. The coach passengers have all been cleared, since they were curtained off from first class and left through the rear of the plane. The other speculate that Candlewell must’ve been on drugs and more than one person had to have been involved to cause all the mess. Nick asks Grissom what he thinks and Grissom replies that all the witnesses say Candlewell went crazy and died. Unless the evidence proves otherwise, that’s what went down. He assigns Nicky to work with the coroner, Catherine and Warrick to handle witness interviews, and he and Sara will process the plane. And by “process” I mean “flirt and gaze lustily at each other.”

Catherine and Warrick head into the lounge to talk to the suspects witnesses. We see a redhaired flight attendant, an older couple, a younger couple, a younger single guy, an older man, a mom and her daughter, and one bald dude. Everyone’s tired and irritable but none moreso than the bald dude, who whines that the CSIs can’t keep them there. Catherine puts on her best Suspect Whisperer voice and calms the dude down. Warrick is impressed. “More flies with honey,” Catherine says.

Back in the plane, Sara, joined by SuperDave, looks through Candlewell’s wallet and makes a sad face after seeing a picture of his wife and kid, but first she pockets all his money. Oh, I’m kidding. Sara’s not like that. She’ll sneak it out of the evidence locker lately. Candlewell’s body is taken out while Grissom talks to the pilot, who says he saw Candlewell board and he seemed perfectly normal then. It wasn’t until the attendant, Shannon, asked the pilot to address an issue with a passenger that he knew something was wrong. Candlewell was banging on the door of an occupied bathroom and had to be told to return to his seat. The pilot tells Grissom that there was nothing out of the ordinary about Candlewell’s agitated behavior and adds that flying makes people react in different ways.

Morgue. The pretty lady coroner is still hanging around waiting for Doc Robbins to take over, I see. She takes Candlewell’s temperature, which is higher than it should be for a guy who’s been dead for two hours. Nicky does some math fu and realizes Candlewell had a fever of almost 102 when he died. He’s also got petechial hemorrhaging, a shoe-shaped bruise on his neck, multiple contusions on his body, and a broken hand. Nicky is confused; Candlewell has defensive and aggression wounds on his hands.

Grissom and Sara are putting cones with nametags in each of the first class cabin seats. Grissom realizes the back of one seat is broken, making it crowd the seat behind it, which is where Candlewell was sitting. They check the manifest and Nate Metz, aka the younger single guy, was sitting in the broken seat. Metz, a self-important type A dickwad, tells Catherine and Brass that Candlewell spent most of the flight kicking the back of his seat. Metz says he complained and punched his seat a couple of times after Candlewell ignored him. Catherine takes a look at Metz’ hands and the knuckles look more banged up than a couple of seat punches would account for.

On the plane, Grissom finds a couple of blood drops away from the main action. Sara wonders if it all started there and Grissom retorts it could just be a nose bleed. The passenger in the seat near the blood is Lou Everett, the whiny bald guy. He’s still in a pissy mood, especially now that he can’t get the vending machine to work. Brass and Warrick question him about what happened. Everett says Candlewell kicked Metz’ seat so hard it sent Metz’ laptop crashing to the floor. It looked like an altercation was going to take place so Everett stepped in to keep the piece. Candlewell, mumbling incoherently, slashed at Everett’s face with a CD. Brass realizes Everett had a few drinks on the flight and Everett shoots back that if Brass doesn’t believe him, he can ask the flight attendant.

Cut to Shannon, who’s giving her side of events to Catherine and Brass. She says Candlewell complained of a headache mid-flight and she gave him some aspirin, which he took without water. Catherine asks if he had the headache when he boarded and Shannon says he didn’t. She can’t explain what made things change. She says she’s seen everything in ten years as a flight attendant. “Who knows why anyone does anything?” She’s dismissed just as Grissom walks in and the investigators wonder why nobody’s talking if nothing criminal happened. They’re obviously hiding something and Grissom is thrilled he gets to test his hide and seek skills.

Grissom gets off the phone with the coroner, who told him that besides his external injuries, Candlewell also had a ruptured spleen and internal bleeding. He rattles everything off to Sara, who boggles at him all, “What the fuckity fucking fuck?” She’s found a broken wine bottle with blood on the edge, which could account for Candlewell’s defensive wounds. The bottle was found in front of Marlene Valdez’ seat. Cut to Marlene, the wife in the older couple, who’s bitching to Brass and Catherine about her ruined shirt. She tells them how Candlewell was agitated and she was sure he was going to hijack the plane, so she badgered her henpecked husband into confronting Candlewell. Candlewell shoves Valdez into a drink cart, breaking the wine bottle and sending wine flying all over Marlene’s shirt. She picked up one end of the bottle and used it to ward off Candlewell, cutting his hands.

Transition to Grissom and Sara, speculating that if Candlewell’s hands were slashed by the bottle, maybe he went to the bathroom next. At first glance they see nothing but Sara hands Grissom the ALS and he spots something. He peers at it more closely with a mini-microscope and Sara realizes what’s up or, rather, what was up earlier. Grissom confirms it’s semen and they both grin like tantalized middle schoolers over a couple of passengers becoming members of the Mile High Club. Sara realizes whoever was banging in the bathroom may not have known what was going on in the cabin. Grissom agrees, saying sex at high altitude heightens (pun intended?) the sexual experience and increases euphoria but Sara begs to differ. “It’s good…I don’t know if it’s that good.” Grissom looks sharply at her but Sara flips it back on him and demands he cite his source. He tries to divert back to the case but she grins and won’t relent. He claims he read about it in a magazine, which she’s never heard of, and he cheekily says he’ll get her a subscription. Yeah, a subscription TO HIS PANTS. He turns the tables and tells Sara to cite her source. She begs off but he uses the age-old and unassailable schoolyard retort: “You started it!” Blushing, Sara rattles off the details of her personal Mile High Club experience. Well, not those details. Grissom looks uncomfortably turned on enough as it is, and he’s happy to get back to work when she suggests it.

Inside the lounge, Catherine talks to the younger couple, who were obviously the ones occupying the lavatory, although they’re not admitting it. All she learns is that they’re married but not to each other. Back to Sara, collecting evidence from the bathroom. She dusts handprints on the ceiling and mutters an impressed, “Stallion.” Back again to Catherine, who’s complaining about the tight-lipped witnesses to Warrick. He thinks Candlewell was killed by one of the passengers and the others are too afraid to talk. And back to the plane, where Sara finds fibers from Candlewell’s pants. In the lab, Greg is examining Candlewell’s clothes when Nicky arrives. Greg tells him that he found no blood or saliva, but there are a lot of shoe prints on the back of Candlewell’s jacket.

Catherine’s enjoying a tasty snack when Grissom barges in and says he needs the passengers’ shoes. She wonders why he can’t collect them and he whines about how she’s the people person and gives her a pitiful puppy look. She rolls her eyes but does his bidding. After the shoes are all tested, Catherine says she needs to see Everett, Max Valdez, and Kiera Berhle, the mom of the little girl. After talking to Everett and Valdez, which we don’t get to see, Kiera is taken into the office. Brass tells her that her daughter, Emily, will need to go with an officer. Then he kneels down and chats with Emily, saying if he can borrow her mom for a few minutes she can borrow anything on him. Emily immediately asks for his gun. I think this budding little sociopath is the prime suspect. Brass is like “Oooookay, that’s creepy. How ’bout you take my badge instead?”

Brass goes inside the office and tells Kiera, “Cute kid,” but it’s clear he wants to ask if Emily wets the bed and sets small pets on fire. Catherine notices that Kiera, who is a doctor, has a black eye. Kiera says she got it while trying to help Candlewell, “the price you pay for being a good Samaritan.” Kiera recounts how she went to help Candlewell when he passed out and accidentally stepped on him in the narrow aisle when trying to roll him over. She says she attempted CPR, to no avail, and she’s satisfied with how she handled everything. Brass suggests the first one to talk gets a deal and Kiera insists she doesn’t need one, but Brass retorts that Emily may need her to take a deal.

On the plane, Grissom gets off the phone with Catherine and tells Sara to look for a defibrillator. She finds it but after examining the paddles says it hasn’t even been used. “There was more lubricant in the bathroom.” Hee! Sara wonders why a doctor wouldn’t try to shock Candlewell, since she likely knew every commercial airline carries a defibrillator. Grissom adds that even if Kiera didn’t know, Shannon did.

Shannon tells Catherine that Candlewell was already dead when she thought to use the paddles. That’s not good enough for Catherine, who points out that Shannon is trained to use them in an emergency. Shannon insists she was scared, because Candlewell was screaming and kicking on the cockpit door. She says she thought he was going to take the whole plane down. Catherine ticks off how the Valdezes were occupied but what about the passenger closest to the action? Shannon says that was Mr. Cash, who was in his seat.

Cut to Grissom and Warrick approaching Mr. Cash, who is perhaps more commonly known as Philip Banks from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Hee, “Banks” and “Cash.” I wonder if that was deliberate? Anyway, Warrick asks Cash what he saw and Cash, amused, says not much. Grissom irritably bitches about the long night and basically tells Cash to stop dicking him around. Cash is like, “I’m blind, Mr. Crankypants.” Oh, Grissom. Is that foot delicious? At Warrick and Grissom’s urging, Cash recounts everything he heard. He recalls how the ruckus increased in sound as more passengers jumped in to subdue Candlewell until Emily screamed and then, “I never heard such silence.”

After getting a page, Grissom meets Lady Coroner (no relation to Lady Heather) at the morgue. She rattles off a bunch of medical mumbo jumbo that I’m not going to recap because I have a glass of wine waiting for me if I finish this in the next hour. In short, Candlewell had undiagnosed encephalitis that went off with the change in altitude and pressure. The swelling in his brain caused his abnormal behavior but it wasn’t the only thing that killed him. Lady Coroner says the encephalitis, ruptured spleen, internal bleeding, and a stopped heart all contributed to Candlewell’s death.

It’s time for roleplaying! No, we’re not in Grissom and Sara’s lovenest, alas. The team has assembled in the plane, dummies in tow. No, not Hodges. He won’t show up for a few more years. The dummies represent passengers who weren’t involved in events, except for Candlewell. Grissom says the physical evidence doesn’t match what the witnesses are saying and he trusts the evidence. Catherine agrees with him. He decides they’re going to re-create the flight from the moment Candlewell was escorted back to his seat by the co-pilot, with the team playing different passengers. Brass is Everett, Sara is Shannon, Catherine is Kiera, and Nicky and Warrick are hilariously playing the Valdezes. Nicky calls dibs on the husband and Warrick points out that he’s a henpecked weenie. Grissom will be playing Metz. He says they’ve only got 10 minutes until the FAA steals their crime scene, so they’d better bust a move.

They deduce that the altercation started with Candlewell kicking Metz’ seat, then Everett jumped in and despite his story, probably threw a punch at Candlewell and got slashed by a CD in return. He was followed by the Valdezes. Candlewell, his encephalitis in full swing, headed towards the front and tried to get into the cockpit, but it was locked. The pilot calls the first class cabin but Shannon had frozen and was useless. Then Candlewell went for the exit door, trying to open it, which set off a panic. Cash heard Metz and Max Valdez get to Candlewell first, then Everett, Marlene, and Kiera, and it became a free-for-all, with the five taking Candlewell down and kicking and punching him.

Sara jumps in and points out a crucial detail, “If you jump a guy at the exit, he dies at the exit.” Nicky speculates that Candlewell tried to get away but, Catherine adds, by that point it had become a mindless mob. After Candlewell had crawled down the aisle and was stomped and beaten to death, Kiera went through the CPR motions for show. The team looks horrified and depressed when it hits them how things went down.

As the sun rises, Grissom stands on the tarmac and tells the sheriff that five of the passengers should be arrested for murder. He says he just needs more time to prove his case, which looks like self defense on the surface but is really mob-driven murder. The sheriff isn’t going to be making any arrests, since anyone would do what it takes if they felt their life was in danger on a plane. Grissom says a jury would say that but it’s not what the evidence says. The sheriff replies that that’s the point. He drives off and Grissom looks frustrated.

Later, the team watches a news report about the incident, with the reporter saying the passengers have been released and nobody will be charged. Warrick shuts off the TV, telling them to let it go, especially since the FAA has backed up the sheriff. Nicky and Sara are appalled that five people got away with murder. Warrick tells them it’s not about justice, but about how people react when they feel threatened. He’s not condoning what they did, but says he understands it. Sara says a man is still dead and Nicky adds that the distance between the exit door and the aisle where Candlewell was found is the difference between self-defense and murder. Sara says it doesn’t matter was the circumstances were, she could never take a life. Nicky’s not sure, Warrick says he could if it was between him and a threatener, and Catherine pipes up that if it involves protecting her daughter, she’d go all the way.

Grissom is asked what he would do and he says he can’t answer the question, because they’re all looking at it from the side of the passengers. Nobody’s looking at it from Candewell’s side, adding that the passengers assumed because of Candlewell’s behavior that he was a threat. Catherine snaps back that he was a threat and Grissom replies that he became a threat, but it didn’t have to be that way. If even one person had considered why Candlewell was behaving the way he was, he might have lived. “It took five people to kill him. It would have taken only one person to save his life.”

And that’s one to grow on.

Next up: I’ll be recapping “Sex, Lies and Larvae.” Obviously. Also, I’m going to be recapping new CSI episodes starting this week (whoops, make that next week. Effing basketball) for Satellite TV Guru. Those who enjoy my typically rambling recaps may be disappointed because I’ll have a much, much shorter allowable word maximum, but I do hope y’all will read and comment on them anyway. I’m also recapping Criminal Minds and American Idol over there as well.

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Channing Tatum Wanted For 'Eclipse' By 'Twilight' Screenwriter

at 4:09 PM 0 comments

channing tatum Pictures, Images and Photos

Now that's some casting I could sink my teeth into. Crickets. Sorry, I'm desperately in need of more coffee.

Twilight and New Moon screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg told E! Online this weekend, that she thinks that thinks Channing Tatum would be perfect to play bad-boy vampire Riley in Eclipse, the third in the four-book series.

"There's a very big battle at the end with Riley, and I think Channing would do that so well. And there are some complexities to that character," she adds. "He really is tragic. He's a puppet for Victoria [bad-girl vampire played by Rachelle Lefevre]. So he has to break your heart a little bit at the end when he realizes that she doesn't want him. Channing could do that beautifully."

Rosenberg also has some good news for Robert Pattinson fans; while Edward Cullen, Pattinson's character, isn't in New Moon as much as he's in the others, he's going to be a hugh presence in Eclipse.

Rosenberg said. "He's so present in her mind throughout the entire center of the book, so we really played off that, and it kept him alive in a slightly different way, but fans will feel it's true to the book. You can't have a Twilight without Rob Pattinson."

This Channing thing needs to happen. Who wants to start a petition?

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Robert Pattinson Will Get Romantic In 'Remember Me'

at 3:56 PM 2 comments


As if he's not busy enough juggling supposed off-screen love interests Nikki Reed and Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson is set to fall in love with Mama Mia! star Amanda Seyfried in Remember Me.

The romance is scheduled to be filmed in between Twilight sequels New Moon and Eclipse some time this summer and will be produced by Summit Entertainment, the production company behind the vampire novel film franchise. Poor guy is going to be exhausted by the time he's done filming all these upcoming projects.

But at least the love scenes probably won't be as traumatic for the boy.

Gallery Info: Robert Pattinson at the 3rd Annual Starz Hollywood Awards.


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07 April 2009

Coldplay For You lyrics

at 9:48 AM 0 comments


If you're lost and feeling low,
Circumnavigate the globe,
All you have is hope,
For you.

And the way you seem to flow
Circumnavigate the globe,
I never seem to lose control,
With you.

Everyone of us is high,
Everyone of us is low,
Everyone of us is here,
How about you?
Your eyes are closed,
Your head held low,
Your eyes are closed.

Everyone of us is high,
Everyone of us is low,
Everyone of us has hope,
For you.

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05 April 2009

Eminem Bottle Lyrics

at 11:56 AM 1 comments


Ooww Ladies and gentlemen
The moment you’ve all been waiting for ..
In this corner : weighing 175 pounds,
with a record of 17 rapes, 400 assaults, and 4 murders,
the undisputed, most diabolic villain in the world :
Slim Shady!

Chorus : Eminem
So crack a bottle, let your body waddle
Don’t act like a snobby model you just hit the lotto
Uh-oh Uh-oh, bitch3s hopping in my Tahoe
Got one riding shotgun and no not one of them got gloves
Now where’s the rubbers? Whose got the rubbers?
Seems like there’s so many of them
and there’s really not that many of us.
Ladies love us, my posse’s kicking up dust.
It’s on till the break of dawn
and we’re starting this party from dusk

Ok … let’s go

Eminem
Back wit Andre, the giant, mister elephant tusk
Picture us, you’ll just be another one bit the dust
Just one of my mothers sons who got thrown under the bus
Kiss my butt. Lick the fumunda cheese from under my nuts
It disgusts me to see the game the way that it looks
Its a must I redeem my name n haters get mushed.
Bitch3s lust. Man they love me when I lay in the cut.
Fist the cup. The lady gave her eighty some paper cut.
Now picture us. Its ridiculous you curse at the thought
Cuz when I spit the verse the sh-t
gets worse then worcestershire sauce
If I could fit the words as picture perfect, works every time
Every verse, every line, as simple as nursery rhymes
Its elementary. The elephants have entered the room.
I venture to say we're the center of attention its true
Not to mention back with a vengeance so here’s the signal
Of the bat symbol. The platinum trio’s back on you hoes.

Chorus : Eminem
So crack a bottle, let your body waddle.
Don’t act like a snobby model.
You just hit the lotto.
Uh-oh Uh-oh, bitches hopping in my Tahoe .
Got one riding shotgun and no not one of them got gloves
Now wheres the rubbers? Whose got the rubbers?
Seems like there’s so many of them
and there’s really not that many of us.
Ladies love us, my posses kicking up dust.
Its on till the break of dawn and were starting this party from dusk.

Ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Dre

Dr Dre
They see that low rider go by they're, like Oh my!
You ain’t got to tell me why you’re sick cuz I know why.
I dip through in that six trey like sick em Dre.
I’m an itch that they cant scratch, they sick of me.
But hey, what else can I say? I love LA.
Cuz over and above all, its just another day
And this one begins where the last one ends.
Pick up where we left off and get smashed again.
I’ll be dammed, just f*cked around and crashed my Benz.
Driving around with a smashed front end
Lets cash that one in.
Grab another one from out the stable
The Monte Carlo, El Camino or the El Dorado
The hell if I know.
Do I want leather seats or vinyl?
Decisions, decisions
Garage looks like Precision Collision.
Or Maaco beats quake like Waco
Just keep the bass low speakers away from your face though

Chorus : Eminem
So crack a bottle, let your body waddle.
Don’t act like a snobby model .
You just hit the lotto.
Uh-oh Uh-oh, bitches hopping in my Tahoe .
Got one riding shotgun and no not one of them got gloves
Now wheres the rubbers? Whose got the rubbers?
Seems like there’s so many of them
and there’s really not that many of us.
Ladies love us,my posses kicking up dust.
Its on till the break of dawn and were starting this party from dusk.

And I take great pleasure in introducing: 50 Cent

50 Cent
It’s bottle after bottle
The money ain’t a thang when you party with me
Its what we into its simple
We ball out of control like you wouldn’t believe
I’m the napalm the bomb the don i’m King Kong
Get rolled on wrapped up and reigned on
I’m so calm through Vietnam ring the alarm
Bring the shaun dawn burn marajauan do what you want
Nigga on and on till the break of what
Get the paper man i’m caking you know i don’t give a f*ck
I spend it like it don’t mean nothing
Blow it like its supposed to be blown
Motherf*cker i’m grown
I stunt i style i flash the sh-t
I gets what the f*ck i want so what I trick
Fat ass burgundy bags classy sh-t Jimmy Cho shoes
I say move a bitch move

Chorus : Eminem
So crack a bottle, let your body waddle.
Don’t act like a snobby model .
You just hit the lotto.
Uh-oh Uh-oh, bitches hopping in my Tahoe .
Got one riding shotgun and no not one of them got gloves
Now wheres the rubbers? Whose got the rubbers?
Seems like there’s so many of them
but there’s really not that many of us.
Ladies love us, my posses kicking up dust.
Its on till the break of dawn and were starting this party from dusk


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Free Download Eminem - Whats Your Nem 2009

at 11:50 AM 0 comments


01. Intro
02. In This Game Feat Notorious BiG
03. Monkeyz
04. Soldier Feat G-Unit (Remix)
05. The I Collapse Feat 50 Cent & 2Pac (Remix)
06. The What, Feat Royce Da 59 & DJ Clue
07. Ill Witem Up (Dissing Everlast) Feat D-12
08. Touchdown Feat T.I.
09. Drug Ballad
10. Square Dance
11. Low Down Dirty
12. Bodygard Feat Dr Dre & Obi Trice
13. We Came To Party Feat 40 Glocc & Jayo Felony
14. Dead Wrong Feat Notorious BiG
15. If I Get Locked Up Tonight Feat Dr Dre
16. Peep Show Feat 50 Cent
17. Hand On You Feat Obie Trice
18. Jimmy Crack Corn Feat 50 Cent
19. Im Having A Relapse (New Single)

Download : http://uploading.com/files/URTZYXTG/Whoo_Kid___2oo9_.rar.html

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01 April 2009

download slumdog millionaire Soundtrack

at 4:46 PM 0 comments

Album: Slumdog Millionaire Soundtrack
Artists: Various Artists
Year: 2008



Tracklist:
1. O... Saya performed by A. R. Rahman, M.I.A.
2. Riots by A. R. Rahman
3. Mausam & Escape by A. R. Rahman
4. Paper Planes performed by M.I.A.
5. Paper Planes (DFA Remix)" performed by M.I.A.
6. Ringa Ringa by A. R. Rahman featuring Alka Yagnik, Ila Arun
7. Liquid Dance by A. R. Rahman featuring Palakkad Sriram, Madhumitha
8. Latika's Theme by A. R. Rahman featuring Suzanne D'Mello
9. Aaj Ki Raat#2 performed by Sonu Nigam, Mahalakshmi Iyer, Alisha Chinai
10. Millionaire by A. R. Rahman featuring Madhumitha
11. Gangsta Blues by A. R. Rahman featuring BlaaZe, Tanvi Shah
12. Dreams on Fire by A. R. Rahman featuring Suzanne D'Mello
13. Jai Ho by A. R. Rahman featuring Sukhwinder Singh, Tanvi Shah, Mahalakshmi Iyer


Download:
http://rapidshare.com/files/211626143/Slumdog_soundtrack.rar

Password:
www.warezfanatics.com

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Oscar Award for Slumdog Kids (Best Picture Award)

at 4:08 PM 0 comments

Oskar Best Picture Award SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE:Oskar Award for Best Picture is for the Slumdog Millionaire for which both the Kids Azhar and Rubina are very much excited to go to America. As we walk towards Mohammed Azharuddin's house - the shanty where the young Salim from Slumdog Millionaire stays - we only find his old father, Mohammed Ismail, a TB patient, resting.



Across the road, young Latika or Rubina Ali stays in a one room hutment. Her sister informs us that Azhar and Rubina are on their way back from the passport office.

The Slumdog kids, as they are known these days, are well on their way to Los Angeles for the Oscars for the best picture award at Oscar for SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE.

“Not in my dreams did I ever think that I will go to America,” says Rubina.

“Even I would not have ever thought this but I am really happy,” adds Azharuddin.

Meanwhile the controversy surrounding the compensation given to the child actors for the film continues.

Though producer Christian Colson reiterates that the family was given money from a fund set up to build a new home, the parents deny it.

“Just provide us with a house, we don’t want any car or money,” says Azhar’s father Mohammed Ismail.

“They have provided us with anything,” adds Azhar’s mother Shameem Ismail.

However far away from these money matters are little Rubina and Azhar who have been assured of their passports by Thursday. But with Visa formalities yet to be settled, it remains to be seen whether these kids actually make it to the Oscars.

“I have to buy clothes and shoes for the award ceremony,” says an excited Rubina.
“I have to thank Danny uncle as I am going to America,” adds Azhar.

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Aliens in America: Pilot (Episode 1)

at 2:14 AM 2 comments

In today’s troubling times, with its ever-shifting geopolitical landscape, when Americans are questioning allegiances both at home and abroad, what do they need to see on television? What show can the CW put on to help staunch the flow of religious intolerance and socio-political turmoil? If you said “America's Next Top Model” – I would totally agree with you, but you would be wrong. Enter “Aliens in America,” a slice of homegrown humor on the CW.

Set in Medora, Wisconsin, “Aliens in America” features our hero, Justin Tolchuck, a 16 year-old social pariah struggling through life in small town Wisconsin and whose social skills are not matched by his insightful and endearing inner monologue. Justin is joined in the Tolchuck household by his father Gary, who we all know is really Luke Danes from Luke's Diner in Stars Hollow.

Luke-Gary is clearly in the witness protection program or in deep, deep undercover, taking a sabbatical from serving Lorelei and Rory pancakes for a bit, and is the entrepreneurial leader of the Tolchuck clan. The over-doting Matriarch of the clan, Franny, has a spot-on Midwestern accent, close-mindedness to follow, and vice-like grip on managing her family. Rounding out the household is Justin's younger (and cooler and better looking) sister Claire.

The pilot episode opens with Justin on the cusp of his Junior year in High School, which Franny proclaims to Justin is going to be “your year.” After Justin has let us know that the previous years have been decidedly “not his,” a slow and steady build up ensues in which we, the gentle viewers, are led to believe that this will be Justin's year. First, he has a run-in with the school bullies, a set of twins, in which the creepiness of the suggestion that Justin should have an incestuous relationship with his sister is the only injuring that lingers from the conversation, and Justin is happy to have escaped without any bruising. After find inspiration in the avoidance of an assault, Justin then finds himself overhearing, and ultimately passively partaking in some locker room banter at the expense of his sister. Yes...it just might just be his year after all. Can see the build up on this one a mile away?

The tricycle starts descending down the crest of Mount Everest as soon as Justin sees a list of the high school's most “bangable” girls. Clare, in a stroke of seeming good fortune, has achieved placement at slot number 3. Justin, in a decided stroke of misfortune, is creeping up behind her at slot number 8. Justin has a tragic realization that “the problem wasn't my hair or braces - the problem was me. And I was never going to change.” It is such a “The Wonder Years” moment that I find myself wishing that a soulful tune by Bob Dylan or The Birds was playing in the background.

In a mommy bird protecting her flock move, Franny marches into school to see the guidance counselor, securing Justin’s ascent to position #6 on the list. The guidance counselor/top-selling car sales man in town makes a radical suggestion that the Tolchucks get an exchange student as a measure to help Justin fit in, and points to the Arian ideal smiling on the front cover of the brochure. Our hero and his parents head to the airport to pick up their blond haired, blue-eyed key to popularity and instead are greeted by…Raja. From Pakistan. Cue the Islama-pod for music that’s part Middle Eastern, part 60’s psychedelic flashback to really nail the message that the Tolchucks are SHOCKED. Luke-Gary tells Raja that the boy they ordered was supposed to come from London, which apparently Raja did, on his way from Pakistan. Justin looks as though he’s about to pass out as Raja praises Allah for his family. In the airport. In Wisconsin. Good times for everyone at the TSA to enjoy.

As the ever-polite Raja arrives at the Tolchuck’s, the tension is palpable between the non-Pakistanis. Franny invokes her motherly duties and sends Raja to bed at 6:30 so the family can debrief. Luke-Gary doesn’t think that the plan to “return” Raja will fly, even though Franny points out that if she ordered a coffee maker and got a toaster, she’d return it, and asks Luke-Gary “What about the terrorist question,” questioning his civic pride in his belief that Medora isn’t good enough to blow up.

The Tolchucks decide to let Raja stay and we experience Raja’s first day at school with him. Raja gets into the Tolchuck-mobile for a ride to school, and the Islama-pod is cued once again as Raja takes in the sultry Claire. (Something tells me there might be a passage about this sort of thing somewhere in the Koran.) The train wreck that Justin envisioned as Raja’s first day comes to life and culminates with one of Medora’s fine teachers starting a dialogue in her class with the “real live Pakistani who practices Muslimism.” Apparently, the dialogue is a bit one-sided, as one of the students tells Raja he inspires anger amongst the students “because he’s different and his people blew up the buildings in New York.” Yup, that seems about right. Raja comes home and starts venting to Justin about the frustrations of his day, and ultimately stops himself by chanting Islamic prayers. Justin’s voice-over informs us that this is the strangest thing he’s ever seen in his house, and that includes the time when a clown died there.

We come to find out that while Raja says prayers for comfort in strength, Justin finds the same thing in a tray of brownies and a CD. Ok, we are now at the point in the program, where we, the humble viewers, are seeing the beginning of a friendship, a bit of common understanding. You know what that means right? MONTAGE! Oh yes, even the most seasoned shows aren’t immune to it, that scene-rific way of telling a story set to a really good song where the writers get a break from all that tedious dialogue. Wait…are we sure this isn’t the “Wonder Years?” Yes, we are sure - The music is decidedly post-1968. We see Justin and Raja playing soccer (amongst the alpacas that Luke-Gary is raising as an investment opportunity), we see Justin and Raja playing video games, we see Justin and Raja sharing secrets. We see it all, and we understand. Sigh. Franny and Luke-Gary are still a bit upset with the turn of events that has them believing a jihadist is sleeping in their guest room and go back to Mr. Guidance Counselor/Top Car Sales Man and complain. After admitting that he knew that Raja was Pakistani, he tells the Tolchucks that the situation has become a political hot potato, one that the American International Exchange Program in all of its power (which is apparently quite great) ordered him to resolve. After appealing to the Tolchuck’s better selves doesn’t work, Mr. I’ve-got-a-Toyota/Diploma-for-you shows them the first check they’ll receive for housing Raja and Luke-Gary sees the light.

All is well and good until Franny comes home and sees Justin praying toward Mecca with Raja. While one can assume that most Midwestern mothers have high hopes for things that their sons will become, it is probably extremely safe to say Muslim does not rank high on that list. I’m not judging, I’m just saying. With one snap assessment and one false claim that Grammy Tolchuck is dying, Franny has Justin in the car on the way to the airport to pick up a return ticket for Raja on the ‘ole express flight from Chippewa Falls to Islamabad. When Franny tells Raja that he has to go home because of an “insurance issue,” there are some long faces. Justin is bummed (he’s losing a newly formed friend), Luke-Gary is disappointed (he’s losing money) and Raja is knowingly aware of what’s going on, but graciously accepts his fate. As he packs, Franny tries to alleviate her guilt by telling Raja that she is sure that his mother is probably missing him and that this is for the best. Well, put your foot in your mouth, Franny, because Raja’s mother is DEAD. Yup, so is his Dad. Nice going, Franny! Apparently, this simple admission from the young Pakistani is enough to help Franny see him as a young boy, and she changes her mind, flipping the lie to Raja. Hooray! Raja can stay! The show can go on, and it won’t be changed to “Aliens in America Who Couldn’t Stay Because Americans Don’t Like Middle Easterners,” which may have a demographic base across the US, but would be a bit tough to market and promote.

The show wraps with the best dinner ever with Raja, the Tolchucks and Clare’s new boyfriend, who is (whisper) black. It’s possible Franny might work to ship him off to Islamabad in future episodes, and that is definitely worth tuning in for.

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